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Friday, January 30, 2009

His Priorities ~ Chapter 16

Sorry I haven't posted. We have been sick, sick, sick...I actually accidentally OD'd Belle today on Actametiphan (did I spell that right? Whatever!) I had to call poison control...they said she would be fine. Then Mr B actually left me home with them! After I almost killed our first born! I am not to be trusted. Oh and Sophia, I love you...you know who you are! :)

Do you feel your husband's priorities are in the right order? Explain. I think in his head they are in the right order, but its his practice where he gets out of whack. By making work first, he thinks he is providing what our family needs most. No, what our family needs is him. I know he thinks by doing extra, it is in our best interest, but there are some nights I just need him. Work be damned! The extra things he does are not his responsibility, but when he does them, they become his. He doesn't understand that endless cycle.

Do you feel that you are first after God on your husband's priority list? How does that make you feel? Again, in his head I am. That is where I should and want to be, but like I said, work seems to come first. Even above his own well being.

Do you ever feel that you are unprotected, unloved, or uncovered because you are not a priority with your husband? Yes. When I tell him I am really sick (like today) and I really need him home, since I don't have anyone to help me with three small children and he goes to work anyway, I feel low on the list. I know if it were reversed, I would stay home in a flash for him, even if we didn't have kids. Just to take care of him.

Can you think of ways you could set aside time for you and your husband to be alone doing things he enjoys? List them. This is something I do strive to do. He likes to watch fights (boxing, UFC, etc) so I try to be excited about them too and plan fun food and watch them with him.

Do you ever wish your husband would take more time for you alone than he does? Explain. We don't have enough alone time together because we have so many small children. I would like to have more, but its not his fault we don't.

Do you ever feel your husband puts his children before you? In what ways? Yes. Belle has a hold on him. Whatever she asks, she gets. He is working on it though, so I can't complain too much.

Does your husband ever feel you put your children before him? Are you sure? If so, what could you do about this? I believe he does when it comes to Marcus. I feel he is still a baby and especially now when he is sick, I hate to let him cry for long periods of time. He knows that at a certain point I let go, but Marcus just hasn't gotten old enough for me yet.

Do you feel he puts the interests of other people before those of his own family? Explain. How does that affect the family? Whenever his brother calls at 11:00 PM to see if he can come over, Mr B lets him. I hate that because we have kids and I don't like those things sprung on me. I have told him that before, but he has a hard time saying no. He feels like his brother is all alone, which I totally get, but it is still hard to entertain after a day with the kids. I just want that time to be for us, since it is so precious.

2 comments:

Ang said...

I am so sorry you all have been sick. I feel your pain. Chloe and I have passed this mess around for 3 weeks now and I STILL have it..uugghhh..I hope you get to feeling better soon. I can't imagine or remember (ha)being this sick when my kids were little..I don't know what I would have done. My only relief was the he works is that they are old enough to kinda fend for themselves and know mama hasn't REALLY died in the bed..ha Oh if they were babies..not sure I would have the get up and go I would need..bless your heart..I wish we lived closer and I would have rounded them all up like I did my sisters kids and just let her get some much needed rest (she has 3too)

I agree on your post so much. With Charlie being gone so much, obviously work is a priority to him as it should be. Charlie has always been a hard worker, but it's hard being the one left alone with all the responsibilities and things to take care of. hope you feel better soon. Love ya

jill said...

yuck!!! hope you're all feeling better (especially miss belle!)!!!! i know it's not really appropriate to comment here about it, but i tagged you. :)