Here we are again. Another glorious Monday. Oh, the hilarity of last week. Here we go.
Ms. Belle did not tell my mom that she hurt her *ahem* lady area. When my mom inquired if she was ok, Belle did not say, "Grandma, it hurts...will you kiss it".
I don't ever fight with Mr B and I certainly don't yell out at him that "I'm PREGNANT" just to win an argument. If I am pregnant, I was totally planning to surprise him for Valentines Day, so yelling it at him is totally not something I would do.
I did not buy a four pack of pregnancy tests yesterday even though I am not supposed to get my period for another 5 days. I haven't already peed on two...they were negative...(they really were negative. I will take another Wednesday and another Friday...between you and me "WOO HOO!" I am not ready to be pregnant again, but if God sends us the blessing, I will be more than happy to accept another gift)...back to Not Me's...
I didn't get an enormous craving for rotisserie chicken at 2 AM and then proceed to the grocery store in my husband's Darth Vader pajama pants to claim my victory. I would never pout when there were NO rotisserie chickens and instead by a pair of $9 chicken breasts instead. I then didn't come home and spend an hour cooking said breasts, while my cravings started to make me hallucinate. Mr B didn't wake up right when they finished and eat one while I ate the other as we watched season two of The Office...craving TOTALLY satisfied. I didn't notice today that their wrapper said "Turkey"...huh?
I don't secretly wish that I was the husband and Mr B was the wife.
I didn't meet the most amazing Pomeranian this weekend and then make Mr B promise to get me one. I mean, we have two German Shepherds...a Pomeranian is a tasty snack. I haven't already started picking out names and dreaming of Christmas dresses...