Tuesday, February 3, 2009

His Fatherhood ~ Chapter 18

1.Has your husband ever worried about being a good father? Have you ever asked him if he does? He is a great father. I know he worries about explaining the affair and how they will react. Knowing that he betrayed their mother. But when it comes to his relationship with them, I could not imagine a better father.

2. Did your husband have a good father? What does he say his relationship with his father is like? What is it like today? Today his father is on medication for a chemical imbalance, which he didn't get on until about 12 years ago. So up until Mr B was 14 or so, his father rarely talked to him, but he rarely talked to anybody. Since I came around 10 years ago, I never knew him when he was like that. Mr B says he is night and day. His dad is so nice and wants to love and kiss on his grand kids. Its nice to have, but sometimes it seems like he tries to make up for not being a great dad. He wants to do things like have his three kids, their spouses and their kids spend the night at their house on Christmas Eve and wake up there on Christmas. He doesn't get that we want to have Christmas morning at our house and he gets upset. He was actually upset with me this year because we spent more time at my moms. My brother had flown in from California and had never seen Marcus, so I wanted to spend more time there this year. We did go over in the evening, but I could tell he was put out with me.

3. Does your husband emulate his father as a dad or does he feel the need to be better than his dad was? I don't think either. I don't think he compares himself to his dad. He just loves on our kids. Not to out do anybody or be better than anybody.

4. Does your husband have a good relationship with each of his children? Yes.

5. Do you feel your husband has bonded with each of his children? Have you bonded with each of your children? Yes and Yes.

6. Does your husband ever feel guilty or like he has failed as a parent when he sees something wrong with his children? Not yet.

7. Do you ever feel your husband is more concerned with being a good father than with being a good husband? How does it make you feel? Yes. I think he thinks marriage doesn't take work. It should just happen. When he's home, he wants to see the kids. I am praying hard about that. I need his affection and he is the only one I can get it from. The kids need him too I know, but in the end, they will leave, so we need to work on our relationship now if we plan to grow old together.

1 comment:

Ang said... well said!!!! I am so thankful you have the insight now to work on your marriage. You are exactly right, the children will be gone one day and it will be just you all...that relationship has to be nurtured thru the years or you all will have nothing in common 'but' the kids when they leave. Obviously there is nothing wrong in the kids being a common interest..but there needs to be so much more.